Personal Lab using VMWare Server

Good news is I have finally created my own lab using VMware Server.
No Dual Boot, no need to purchase additional Hardware just me & my laptop.

Loaded Latest Ubuntu & Solaris 10 so that I can use these & get more handson.

Oh, BTW Santosh is back to India from Dubai.

Wish you Happy new Year!

3 Idiots

Gatecrashers shook hands with Obama at state dinner

This has been the most funniest picture I have ever seen. I guess Obama invited them personally. ;-)

This is the most funny incident of this year...... atleast White House Security Agencies should not have disclosed it.

Best memories.....

OpenSUSE

Year 2004, I was impressed by Xandros Linux. I used it for 1 year on my Office Desktop. I loved it.

Year 2005, I used SimplyMEPIS at my office, I simply wiped off Windows & kept using MEPIS till I left the company. I used it to the full extent, used network printers, Mail Client, Web browsing, IM.

Year 2006, used Ubuntu, pretty nice Distro but lacks fun part :-( Hardware compatibility is fantastic, but...it lacks something which was there in previous Distros which I used.

Year 2009, after a long time I used OpenSUSE & it impressed to the every possible extent, Finally .....I found a good distro that runs on my laptop (pretty much low end, 2GB/40GB,Celeron M) .

I downloaded the ISO for fun, installed it on a USB (4GB) & still running it. I will let my wife use it, test it for a week or so & will install it permanently on my Laptop. :-)

Scary Clouds

Lovely Hair Cutting Saloon

Les Fontaines

Les Fontaines - One of the best places I have visited so far.

URL: http://www.les-fontaines.com/site/en/chateau-capgemini/chateau-capgemini.php

Quick & Dirty way to make applications SSO enabled

This is the quick & dirty way to make applciations SSO enabled. Next thing,You can use Server Variable 'AUTH_USER' as primary key to access LDAP server & retrieve Details of user.

function authenticate(){ 
 $username = $_SERVER['AUTH_USER']; // Server Variable AUTH_USER is the key of this code. 
 $auth_user = array('user1','user2','user4','user5'); 
 /* Keep adding users to this array or call a function to create this array from a flat Text file. 
 Alternatively you can write a SQL to get authenticate user. */
 $domain = 'mydomain\\';
 foreach ($auth_user as $item){ 
 if($username == $domain.$item) { return 1;} } 
 return 0;
}
if(!authenticate()){print "Access Denied"; exit();}

Fate it seems

I get into a fight which has nothing to do with me....which is called as Duniyadaari..
And I realise after one and half year...I am not getting benifitted from it.

That is the a frustration I am having right now. I believe one needs to be more popular than Sound at thoughts. People recognise one by his name & not what he has done.

Sick world....you can not trust anyone !!

Waiting for a Good Hollywood Movie

For almost over a month I am just chewing on Animated movies from Hollywood.
I just watched KungFu Panda, Ratatouille, Madagascar 2...pretty good movies. I loved watching WAAL-E as well but what is happening to Hollywood?!!!! I am not excited about any film at all. Also I have not heard of any big release coming soon after The Terminator Salvation.
Oh...one movie which I missed ...Inglorious Bastards seems interesting...of course because of QT.
Nowadays Brad Pitt doesn't really excite me. :-)

Kaminey.....reviewed

All newspapers have given four Starts to the most awaited film of 2009.......Kaminey.

Finally I got a chance to catch this film. I had a quick preview of this movie on my laptop. Thanks to the DivX which I grabbed it via http://thepiratebay.org

Movie did not start with a Bang or something or it was not even very impressive as well but it became a rollercoaster ride after the Interval.

Movie keeps you busy all the time, it makes you feel the Rain of Bombay, it makes you walk Dirty lanes of Bombay, makes you run through corridors of Five star Hotel in Mumbai. (I mentioned Bombay & mumbai both ...that is intentional :-) you will know why when you watch the movie.)

Film caught me when the Backgrond score started for the first time, DHAN TE NAN...when the first chase sequence starts. That is cool...I kind of liked it.

Movie is so Darn fast that it does not allow you to even laugh at the little jokes (small because you almost do not feel presence of it). The last movie I watched in Theatre was "Fashion"(Good one. Bad one was "Dostana"). Coincidentally I was watching Priyanka with no makeup, no hi-fi make up, no flares(Punjabi dresses would have been better.... the dress which she wears in the first quarter was bad.)

Shahid Kapoor maintains a good look & feel of two characters through out the film. He is not as talented as his father but I would say he is on the right track. Jab We Met was fabulous but Kaminey.... is all about the Screnplay, Director, Good Acting & one major factor is "Shahid".

Vishal Bharadwaj is quiet an amazing guy. It is almost unbelievable that he is a music director turned Movie Director.

One more important thing I felt about the film is I wont be able to narrate the story to anybody, you will have to watch the movie to enjoy it. And it does not leave a sick feeling once it is over.

So...ALL THE BEST... KAMINEY....

(Kareena keep doing terrible movies like Kambakht Ishq.........Shahid is going too FAR in his career, I hate you as much as I use to adore you before.)

- Jai Maharashtra

KNOW YOUR UNIX SYSTEM ADMINISTRATOR -- A FIELD GUIDE

There are four major species of Unix sysad:

1) The TECHNICAL THUG.  Usually a systems programmer who has been
forced into system administration; writes scripts in a polyglot of the
Bourne shell, sed, C, awk, perl, and APL.

2) The ADMINISTRATIVE FASCIST.  Usually a retentive drone (or rarely,
a harridan ex-secretary) who has been forced into system
administration.

3) The MANIAC.  Usually an aging cracker who discovered that neither
the Mossad nor Cuba are willing to pay a living wage for computer
espionage.  Fell into system administration; occasionally approaches
major competitors with indesp schemes.

4) The IDIOT.  Usually a cretin, morpohodite, or old COBOL programmer
selected to be the system administrator by a committee of cretins,
morphodites, and old COBOL programmers.



HOW TO IDENTIFY YOUR SYSTEM ADMINISTRATOR:


---------------- SITUATION: Low disk space. ----------------

 TECHNICAL THUG: Writes a suite of scripts to monitor disk
usage, maintain a database of historic disk usage, predict future disk
usage via least squares regression analysis, identify users who are
more than a standard deviation over the mean, and send mail to the
offending parties.  Places script in cron.  Disk usage does not
change, since disk-hogs, by nature, either ignore script-generated
mail, or file it away in triplicate.

 ADMINISTRATIVE FASCIST: Puts disk usage policy in motd.  Uses
disk quotas.  Allows no exceptions, thus crippling development work.
Locks accounts that go over quota. 

 MANIAC:
# cd /home
# rm -rf `du -s *  sort -rn  head -1  awk '{print $2}'`;

 IDIOT:
# cd /home
# cat `du -s *  sort -rn  head -1  awk '{ printf "%s/*\n", $2}'`  compress


---------------- SITUATION: Excessive CPU usage. ----------------

 TECHNICAL THUG: Writes a suite of scripts to monitor
processes, maintain a database of CPU usage, identify processes more
than a standard deviation over the norm, and renice offending
processes.  Places script in cron.  Ends up renicing the production
database into oblivion, bringing operations to a grinding halt, much
to the delight of the xtrek freaks.

 ADMINISTRATIVE FASCIST: Puts CPU usage policy in motd.  Uses
CPU quotas.  Locks accounts that go over quota.  Allows no exceptions,
thus crippling development work, much to the delight of the xtrek
freaks.

 MANIAC:
# kill -9 `ps -augxww  sort -rn +8 -9   head -1  awk '{print $2}'`

 IDIOT:
# compress -f `ps -augxww  sort -rn +8 -9   head -1  awk '{print $2}'`


---------------- SITUATION: New account creation. ----------------

 TECHNICAL THUG: Writes perl script that creates home
directory, copies in incomprehensible default environment, and places
entries in /etc/passwd, /etc/shadow, and /etc/group.  (By hand, NOT
with passmgmt.) Slaps on setuid bit; tells a nearby secretary to
handle new accounts.  Usually, said secretary is still dithering over
the difference between 'enter' and 'return'; and so, no new accounts
are ever created.

 ADMINISTRATIVE FASCIST: Puts new account policy in motd.
Since people without accounts cannot read the motd, nobody ever
fulfills the bureaucratic requirements; and so, no new accounts are
ever created.

 MANIAC: "If you're too stupid to break in and create your own
account, I don't want you on the system.  We've got too many goddamn
sh*t-for-brains a**holes on this box anyway."

 IDIOT:
# cd /home; mkdir "Bob's home directory"
# echo "Bob Simon:gandalf:0:0::/dev/tty:compress -f" > /etc/passwd


---------------- SITUATION: Root disk fails. ----------------

 TECHNICAL THUG: Repairs drive.  Usually is able to repair
filesystem from boot monitor.  Failing that, front-panel toggles
microkernel in and starts script on neighboring machine to load binary
boot code into broken machine, reformat and reinstall OS.  Lets it run
over the weekend while he goes mountain climbing. 

 ADMINISTRATIVE FASCIST: Begins investigation to determine who
broke the drive.  Refuses to fix system until culprit is identified
and charged for the equipment. 

 MANIAC, LARGE SYSTEM: Rips drive from system, uses
sledgehammer to smash same to flinders.  Calls manufacturer, threatens
pets.  Abuses field engineer while they put in a new drive and
reinstall the OS.
 MANIAC, SMALL SYSTEM: Rips drive from system, uses ball-peen
hammer to smash same to flinders.  Calls Requisitions, threatens pets.
Abuses bystanders while putting in new drive and reinstalling OS.

 IDIOT: Doesn't notice anything wrong.


---------------- SITUATION: Poor network response. ----------------

 TECHNICAL THUG: Writes scripts to monitor network, then
rewires entire machine room, improving response time by 2%.  Shrugs
shoulders, says, "I've done all I can do," and goes mountain climbing.

 ADMINISTRATIVE FASCIST: Puts network usage policy in motd.
Calls up Berkeley and AT&T, badgers whoever answers for network
quotas.  Tries to get xtrek freaks fired.

 MANIAC: Every two hours, pulls ethernet cable from wall and
waits for connections to time out.

 IDIOT:
# compress -f /dev/en0


---------------- SITUATION: User questions. ----------------

 TECHNICAL THUG: Hacks the code of emacs' doctor-mode to answer
new users questions.  Doesn't bother to tell people how to start the
new "guru-mode", or for that matter, emacs.

 ADMINISTRATIVE FASCIST: Puts user support policy in motd.
Maintains queue of questions.  Answers them when he gets a chance,
often within two weeks of receipt of the proper form.

 MANIAC: Screams at users until they go away.  Sometimes
barters knowledge for powerful drink and/or sycophantic adulation.

 IDIOT: Answers all questions to best of his knowledge until
the user realizes few UNIX systems support punched cards or JCL.


---------------- SITUATION: Stupid user questions. ----------------

 TECHNICAL THUG: Answers question in hex, binary, postfix,
and/or French until user gives up and goes away.

 ADMINISTRATIVE FASCIST: Locks user's account until user can
present documentation demonstrating their qualification to use the
machine.

 MANIAC:
# cat >> ~luser/.cshrc
alias vi 'rm \!*;unalias vi;grep -v BoZo ~/.cshrc > ~/.z; mv -f ~/.z ~/.cshrc'
^D

 IDIOT: Answers all questions to best of his knowledge.
Recruits user to system administration team.


---------------- SITUATION: Process accounting management. ----------------

 TECHNICAL THUG: Ignores packaged accounting software; trusts
scripts to sniff out any problems & compute charges.

 ADMINISTRATIVE FASCIST: Devotes 75% of disk space to
accounting records owned by root and chmod'ed 000.

 MANIAC:  Laughs fool head off at very mention of accounting.

 IDIOT:
# lpr /etc/wtmp /usr/adm/paact


---------------- SITUATION: Religious war, BSD vs. System V. ----------------

 TECHNICAL THUG:  BSD.  Crippled on System V boxes.

 ADMINISTRATIVE FASCIST: System V.  Horrified by the people who
use BSD.  Places frequent calls to DEA.

 MANIAC: Prefers BSD, but doesn't care as long as HIS processes
run quickly.

 IDIOT:
# cd c:


---------------- SITUATION: Religious war, System V vs. AIX ----------------

 TECHNICAL THUG:  Weeps.

 ADMINISTRATIVE FASCIST: AIX-- doesn't much care for the OS,
but loves the jackboots.

 MANIAC: System V, but keeps AIX skills up, knowing full well
how much Big Financial Institutions love IBM...

 IDIOT:  AIX.


---------------- SITUATION: Balky printer daemons. ----------------

 TECHNICAL THUG: Rewrites lpd in FORTH.

 ADMINISTRATIVE FASCIST: Puts printer use policy in motd.
Calls customer support every time the printer freezes.  Tries to get
user who submitted the most recent job fired.

 MANIAC: Writes script that kills all the daemons, clears all
the print queues, and maybe restarts the daemons.  Runs it once a hour
from cron.

 IDIOT:
# kill -9 /dev/lp ; /dev/lp &


---------------- SITUATION: OS upgrade. ----------------

 TECHNICAL THUG: Reads source code of new release, takes only
what he likes. 

 ADMINISTRATIVE FASCIST: Instigates lawsuit against the vendor
for having shipped a product with bugs in it in the first place.

 MANIAC: 
# uptime
1:33pm  up 19 days, 22:49,  167 users,  load average: 6.49, 6.45, 6.31
# wall
Well, it's upgrade time.  Should take a few hours.  And good luck on that
5:00 deadline, guys!  We're all pulling for you!
^D

 IDIOT:
# dd if=/dev/rmt8 of=/vmunix


---------------- SITUATION: Balky mail. ----------------

 TECHNICAL THUG: Rewrites sendmail.cf from scratch.  Rewrites
sendmail in SNOBOL.  Hacks kernel to implement file locking.  Hacks
kernel to implement "better" semaphores.  Rewrites sendmail in
assembly.  Hacks kernel to . . .

 ADMINISTRATIVE FASCIST: Puts mail use policy in motd.  Locks
accounts that go over mail use quota.  Keeps quota low enough that
people go back to interoffice mail, thus solving problem.

 MANIAC:
# kill -9 `ps -augxww  grep sendmail  awk '{print $2}'`
# rm -f /usr/spool/mail/*
# wall
Mail is down.  Please use interoffice mail until we have it back up.
^D
# write max
I've got my boots and backpack.  Ready to leave for Mount Tam?
^D

 IDIOT:
# echo "HELP!"  mail tech_support.AT.vendor.com%kremvax%bitnet!BIFF!!!


---------------- SITUATION: Users want phone list application. ----------------

 TECHNICAL THUG: Writes RDBMS in perl and Smalltalk.  Users
give up and go back to post-it notes.

 ADMINISTRATIVE FASCIST: Oracle.  Users give up and go back to
post-it notes.

 MANIAC: Tells the users to use flat files and grep, the way
God meant man to keep track of phone numbers.  Users give up and go
back to post-it notes.

 IDIOT:
% dd ibs=80 if=/dev/rdisk001s7  grep "Fred"


@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

OTHER GUIDELINES:


---------------- TYPICAL ROOT .cshrc FILE: ----------------

 TECHNICAL THUG: Longer than eight kilobytes.  Sources the
output of a perl script, rewrites itself.

 ADMINISTRATIVE FASCIST:  Typical lines include:
umask 777
alias cd 'cd \!*; rm -rf ching *hack mille omega rogue xtrek >& /dev/null &'

 MANIAC:  Typical lines include:
alias rm 'rm -rf \!*'
alias hose kill -9 '`ps -augxww  grep \!*  awk \'{print $2}\'`'
alias kill 'kill -9 \!* ; kill -9 \!* ; kill -9 \!*'
alias renice 'echo Renice\?  You must mean kill -9.; kill -9 \!*'

 IDIOT:  Typical lines include:
alias dir ls
alias era rm
alias kitty cat
alias process_table ps
setenv DISPLAY vt100


---------------- HOBBIES, TECHNICAL: ----------------

 TECHNICAL THUG: Writes entries for Obsfuscated C contest.
Optimizes INTERCAL scripts.  Maintains ENIAC emulator.  Virtual
reality .

 ADMINISTRATIVE FASCIST: Bugs office. Audits card-key logs.
Modifies old TVs to listen in on cellular phone conversations.
Listens to police band.

 MANIAC: Volunteers at Survival Research Labs. Bugs office.
Edits card-key logs.  Modifies old TVs to listen in on cellular phone
conversations.  Jams police band.

 IDIOT: Ties shoes.  Maintains COBOL decimal to roman numeral
converter.  Rereads flowcharts from his salad days at Rand.


---------------- HOBBIES, NONTECHNICAL: ----------------

 TECHNICAL THUG: Drinks "Smart Drinks."  Attends raves. Hangs
out at poetry readings and Whole Earth Review events and tries to pick
up Birkenstock MOTAS.

 ADMINISTRATIVE FASCIST: Reads _Readers Digest_ and _Mein
Kampf_.  Sometimes turns up car radio and sings along to John Denver.
Golfs.  Drinks gin martinis.  Hangs out in yuppie bars and tries to
pick up dominatrixes.

 MANIAC: Reads _Utne Reader_ and _Mein Kampf_.  Faithfully
attends Dickies and Ramones concerts.  Punches out people who say
"virtual reality."  Drinks damn near anything, but favors Wild Turkey,
Black Bush, and grain alcohol.  Hangs out in neighborhood bars and
tries to pick up MOTAS by drinking longshoremen under the table .

 IDIOT: Reads Time and _Newsweek_-- and believes them.
Drinks Jagermeister.  Tries to pick up close blood relations-- often
succeeds, producting next generation of idiots.


---------------- 1992 PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION: ----------------

 TECHNICAL THUG: Clinton, but only because he liked Gore's
book.

 ADMINISTRATIVE FASCIST: Bush. Possibly Clinton, but only
because he liked Tipper.

 MANIAC: Frank Zappa.

 IDIOT: Perot.


---------------- 1996 PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION: ----------------

 TECHNICAL THUG: Richard Stallman - Larry Wall.

 ADMINISTRATIVE FASCIST: Nixon - Buchanan.

 MANIAC: Frank Zappa.

 IDIOT: Quayle.


@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

COMPOUND SYSTEM ADMINISTRATORS:


 TECHNICAL FASCIST: Hacks kernel & writes a horde of scripts to
prevent folk from ever using more than their fair share of system
resources.  Resulting overhead and load brings system to its knees.

 TECHNICAL MANIAC: Writes scripts that SEEM to be monitoring
the system, but are actually encrypting large lists of passwords.
Uses nearby nodes as beta test sites for worms.

 TECHNICAL IDIOT: Writes superuser-run scripts that sooner or
later do an "rm -rf /".

 FASCISTIC MANIAC: At first hint of cracker incursions, whether
real or imagined, shuts down system by triggering water-on-the-brain
detectors and Halon system.

 FASCISTIC IDIOT: 
# cp /dev/null /etc/passwd

 MANIACAL IDIOT:  Napalms the CPU.
            -Stephan Zielinski

Surviving the third prolonged Software crash

I am going to remember this day for my entire life. On a Festival Day like this I was working from Morning 9:30 to 5:00 evening. This is the third time when Vendor just could not fix it & I had to take some initiative as nobody was willing to take decisions. One person helped me a lot (never met him though...he is in London). First crash was the worst, second one did not last for even an hour.
This was the worst downtime I have ever seen....more than 40 hours!!! I would have felt ashamed of it but it was not my fault. One of my colleague was asking about what I was doing so late & I answered..."Bureaucracy kills Efficiency..".

I still remember the first downtime...
It was a huge box (Sun v880) & during a Restore it crashed..not even once..it crashed thrice...with no errors !!
I called up Veritas .....I spent 1 hour describing the issue on phone with them for 3 hours...that was the first time I spoke to a white guy for such a long time..

After almost three months I was able to find a Kernel Parameter which triggers flush of Cache to Disk /etc/system -> priority_paging=1
This fixed the issue permanently, while resolving this issue, I understood the importance of Caching, I/O tuning, lot of low level configurations in OS.

Second Time it was Oracle Database & even this time vendor did not help...Oracle's employee helped us out of this situation. Thanks to him, we were saved in just the nick of time.

This time it was the most known Oracle Parameter which creates a mess & it was eventually removed in Oracle 10g. I am sure Oracle might have got lot many queries due to the stupid parameter. Which made them wipe the parameter in next version.

This time (third) it is VMware. They tried Reaping the software which did not work. We had to reinstall everything & do all the configuration manually. Entire process took 12 hours of many people.

Half the time we wasted in doing co-ordination & chasing Directors for approvals. By this time everybody must have known my name in the entire organization.

I certainly need a break after this three days long operation for System Recovery. Funny thing is I am still feeling that it might Crash any moment & my phone might ring again.

Some times Senior managers start shouting in such situations but I have learnt to deal with such people who make unnecessary noise & also start a blame game instead of helping people. I think best is to answer all their questions at that time, that makes them cool down a bit.

Well..time will be able to tell whether system is stable or not, I am going to wait for one week before I make any comment.

Being a root is like Being a Superman

Being a root (under Unix) is like Being a Superman.
Statement Caught my eye in AT&T's Unix Book.(1984 Edition)
Coincidentally Superman has been my Idol since the beginning. This sentence triggered me to learn & use Unix/Linux on my Desktop.
I got this book from a girl who was my neighbour.
She contributed in a big project (probably at NCR), it was about ATM machines, back in 1990s ATM machines was like fantasy. My dad & uncle use to show me their ATM Cards as prestigious asset (which use to lie in their pocket all the time). I saw her name in local newspaper & came to know she was brilliant.

I was in the 8th grade & got this book when she left her place. She just dumped all the books front of her door & probably went to America after that.
In India PC Quest released Linux Kernel 1.0.2 CD in 1997. When I came to know that Linux is almost like a UNIX, I started using it on my Desktop. I installed it using a 2X CDROM drive which I bought for Rs. 3000. Installation was an experience. Whole SWAP partition & X window system was quiet amazing. I use to hear about such stuff from my colleagues who were working at Tata Consultancy Services, Tata InfoTech & Patni etc.
Being a Commerce student it was all like an achievement for lifetime. Never really understood the importance of it but it gave me a good break & boost in my career. It has been 9 years & I have been working on Linux on & off.
After such a long duration it doesn’t really feel so important to learn everything about Linux & get Certified etc. but I definitely feel proud that I have used Linux for such a Long time.

Living with Jinx for Two years

Finally I am writing it down on my Blog.
It has been One year and four months I left the Jinx that some day I might change my Department to SAP & will get a chance to study one of the greatest Software on this Planet.
Unfortunately it never happened.

This chapter started near end of year 2005 when I was about to join Capgemini. Couple of weeks before joining date one of my firend was telling me about his friend's expirence at Capgemini. His friend was absconding as he was told to look after DB2 Databases. He is a certified Oracle DBA & he did not like the idea of doing something else then Oracle. Ironically same thing happened to me & I lost my track of Oracle + Solaris. But it was fun to have a wierd managers & bureaucratic Environement. It took almost a year to get used to typical Corporate enviroment in Indian companies. And now I am an employee of Cognizant Technology Solutions & a contractor for one of the reputed Bank in this World. When I look back I feel what I did was wrong or I am a VICTIM of my own SUCCESS? When I felt that I have lost my track completely I got depressed because I was too much intense to learn SAP. Probably "desperate" is the word. Well..... I am out of it now & since last one and half year my resume has a different Objective. Sometimes I feel a shine in my own eyes when I see a mail with subject "SAP", I feel like I am still searching for something in that mail for openings, and then those two years flash at back of my head & I laugh at myself .....I was foolish to have such an ambition. Perhaps I am made for System Administration. I am feeling already better as I write this paragraph.
So trust me guys as Marcellus Wallace says in movie Pulp fiction...."you may feel a slight sting. That's Ambition f--king with you. F--k Ambition. Ambition only hurts, it never helps."

Concentrate on what you are good at & you will have time of your life. That does not mean you should stop exploring other opportunities for your career growth, but then get over it before it becomes too late & you end up getting frustrated.

Now I am a "happy man" who has a Happy Manager, impressed colleagues and what else do you want?

Jinx free Manoj :-)